It's not you, it's me

Right, right... I HAVE an excuse this time, really!
I don't have an internet connection.
There.
Am I vindicated? Do you feel small and unworthy for having doubted me, my committment to sharing everything that bugs the hell out of me? About all those valuable microseconds of skim reading we have shared? Send all chocolates and plant sex organs c/o of the green woods road Thats what my home address actually translates to - Green Woods Road. Nice huh? Though a little tame in the overall offerings of Lille street names 'Street of the Hunchbacked Cats (I'm serious), Blue Sheep Street (I'm still serious).
And thats my opinion. And if you have an opinion, Lille is the place to give it. Lille, otherwise known as 'Rijsel' in Hollandish gets its 'not quite sure how to pronounce it' name from a little provincial dialect meaning 'so, tell us what you think about it', which is of course my way of saying - there are a lot of surveys here. Really a lot. Drop a bomb in the midddle of the town and you're going to destroy more than lives and property. You're going to destroy wads of valuable information on opinions of somewhat similar yet mildly different forms of bland cheese, and essential remarks on laundry liquid smell. So just put away the TNT you crazy anarchist.
Oh yeah, and anarchy. Whatever they might be saying about the riots where you are - the students are just complaining - big signs, catchy slogans, nothing much else to do because we've effectively blocaded ourselvers out of our own universities (oh, did you not see that one coming - and now you're worried about your exam results aren't you?) The burning cars and riot police? Thats all down to tagalong anarchists. Probably the same ones who've found themselves at a bit of a loose end since last November.